OK... first and for most... remember what i wrote to you about changing my attitude... just yesterday I think I almost closed my door once again.. thank God that "he" is there to change and tame me once again.. bwahahahah
SO I think what I promised to myself is kinda succeeding.. bwahahaha And I'm happy about it... i think my grades are going up or something and i'm being and trying to be open to others which is now happening... hahahahaha
Daz all... BTW I'll change the colors once again!!
i don't know what is my problem... but i felt like my whole body is uncontrolable.. its as if i'm soo tired and i can't even move one of my body part except my arms.. T_T
It's as if my life and soul has been taken away from me... I coulnd't remember a thing.. I couldn't know why..
This day for me is soo deadly because alot of us are crying when they entered the school... that is because of a lot of reasons... dads ready for surgery... ur one and only true love plans to leace you for permanently... everything worth crying for.. and yet i'm here no tears being spalshed from my eyes... but i feel like my shoulder needs someone, something...
even though its been past days after January 01... I just wanna share that this year, I wanna e good...
Since my teacher in Filipino discussed us the Divince Comedy, I was like "oh my gosh I've been bad lately!" Its like I wanna cry... but as they say God is forgiving... I kept on asking for his forgiveness and promised myself that I would really change..
even though I've been a big butt last year, I take back all those memories and wish not to forget it becuase without that, I would forget that because of that reason I was challenged to change.. I just wouldn't go looking for that old me...
I think thats all for this moment eh... thank you!
Its only a few hours before 2005 comes our way... but I wonder, would this year be totally different compared to 2004? I mean would everything be better.. or worse?
And I'm not just talking everything that happends around me ( the politics around the world.. probably I dont care what the hell is happening)... but my life.. Would I enjoy 2005 or would I grudge it just like 2004... I hope I wouldn't pick the grudge because as time goes by and I, myself, keeps on hating it... sooner or later I'll grow up still hating it which is not suppose to be.. don't get what I said? neither do I.. nyahahaha
Soo maybe whatever would happen... God knows what...
the tsunami disaster opened my eyes that maybe, its almost the end of the world. Call me crazy and everything but... if you'll look at it, there are a lot of happenings in this world. The never ending war, the fall of some country.. maybe especially ours... and then this.
it scares me a little because first of all, the countries that got that disaster are near. And what if the next Tsunami falls in our country? There is a possibility that we won't get hit but how about those who are near the beach?
Maybe the day the God would return and clean the country is almost near. I mean i think the tsunami is just one sign. And what if that particular day comes.. and I won't be able to live with those who aren't bad? I've done bad things in my life and kept on saying that I wanna die... but if I just think properly.. I regret everything that I said. Life is a gift, and we should make the best of it because maybe, we don't know that the next day, our time is over. T_T
Oh please forgive me for everything I've done, thought, and said. I regret everything.. please..
ok.. nothing interesting happened to me this past few days.. except that i knew something very important which made my life return to its normal state.. that i have a reason why I'm alive!! sad to say its not the book "purpose driven life" too bad I still couldn't read that book coz my mom kept it to herself... arg arg!!
Anyway, another lesson that I learned... not all guys are the same, emotionless bastards.. i learned that sometimes even though they hide all and i mean ALL their feelings deep inside themselves... sometimes they show it ... kapag tama na ung oras.. ganun lang un..
Oh, I've been trying my best to change myself again.. from wild to a girl who is totally organized and always is responsible... geez, this is soo tough!!
OH ang my picture is like sooooooooooo adorable in friendster... nyahahaha
Suddenly, i didn't want to be called Krizia L. nor kri, nor krish... I want it to be called Izay and for actual no reason...
School is getting nearer.... hope that I still get to keep my scholarship or whatever because my parents would probably be nuts.. nyahahahaah
oh great.. i can't believe that time really flies soo fun when your really having fun.. oh come on!! just kidding..
all i wish for christmas are clothes, clothes and more clothes.. but do you know that some of our "evil" teachers gave us suuuper loong homeworks.. now that is no fun.. plus i don't even plan to start it. hahahahhaa
oh do you know we've got a new dog.. a chihuahua.. so adorable..
plus i learned my lesson this year... if you would like to show someone that you could be somebody they are most probably like, like from clothes to words... that is so UN you!! it is not good that you would copy someone and prove that you could be like HIM!! arg you!!
This lesson is strictly and supposed to be for someone I hate!! mark my words.. you wouldn't ever make me change!! nyaahahahaha..
And I think I'm partly back.. i guess.. i've been the jolly "arte" girl again.. wohooo but I still practice myself from stopping my big mouth shot bad words.. bohooooo
And for those in states, my cousins.. my parents keep on fighting here.... there is no day they wouldn't shout in front of each other or even throw stuff.. see, everything that happens in the philippines been mixed up.. plus DA KING died.. no emotion.. fyi he is lolo's favorite action star.. FPG...
KUya toffy, please call us here or shall I say.. KRIS.. yuck!!
nyahahaha.. i'm from our vacation in hongkong.. and its sooo cool!! especially how the people there dress up!!! gosh they are like how i dress up in my head... like how i imagine my clothes would be like!!!! yeah man!!
The food.. i no like... ummm, clothes I love... the animals.. sooo sweet.. the place... quite crowded... the transportation.. adoring ... everything is almost perfect.. pluz i get to take home one pair of sooo cute boots that doesn't look like boots at al.. hahahahahah..
oh and do you wanna know something? my parents seem to fight most of the days.. as in every day and night.. parang ganun.. and it pisses me off... here i am trying my best to change back myself and here they are trying to destroy my plan.. gezzzzzzzzzzzz. atleast i have someone to make my life better... SNOOPY!! wohooooooooooo
ok, my mom demanded to change my site because it was full of hate you stuff like that.
In two days more it would be our christmas party!! wohoooooo. But the bad fact is that I get to be partner with the most hatred guy in the class.. the mayabang one na feeling!!!grrrrr pero i've got be good..
do you know what, tears came down my face all day.. even at school because something really bad happened!!! bazta.. even my friends and classmates recognized it from my voice eh.. hahahahaha
Something good naman na nag happen... in saturday we would go to hongkong!! woho isn't that cool or what!! but the problem is it would only be for 3 days.. darn it!!
HAPPY christmas to all the people reading this.. if ever still you guys could read my blog.. hahahahahah
my life suddenly returned back to my old happy happy me because guez what... I"VE GOT AN I-POD MINI!!! wahoooooooooooooo
I just can't believe it... I long to have one of these and omg omg omg ... I've got it!!
This is for my 13'th birthday present for being such an asshole , or I mean a good girl and at the same time my christmas present.. ain't this awesome!!!
And to add some more, my dream guy aka the guy of my life just text me... wahooooooooooooo.. no comment.. I mean not that damn shit who thinks I'm head over hills to him... come on you must be kidding me!!!
I dont know what the hell happened to my life... but it seems that its getting worse .. waah
My love life, I couldn't talk to him anymore because his phone is like... broke..
My parents, planned to leave each other but in the end they sorted it out and we , as they think, are a happy family... blahh
my school sucks!! damn.. I think our project hasn't been passed.... damn them all!! and of course, I am even more lazy then ever in doing my assignments... waaah
And the guy which I used to eye.. he sucks big time.. first he wanted us to be friends then he's the one destroying what he said... so parang ako ung napahiya... GOD DAMN IT!! and he wants me to change... sya ba nagbago ba?? kung titingnan nga halos parehas lang nangyari samin eh.. nasisira buhay!! putek ka!!
But if you'll see, if you were me you would already plan to kill yourself but... I don't becuase I am not totally affected.. its like nothing hit my heart.. its like I'm soo emotionless... maybe because back then I used to show a lot of emotions to almost everybody but no body seems to recognize.. that is why I'm like this now... waaaaaaaaaaaah... hatred... assholes!!!
there were a lot of things that happened yesterday... but in the end, I was emotionless..
The IAC thing was over and guess what, to everybody's surprise I wont the 2nd Runner Up place... but do you know what pisses me off a lot... there was once a guy in my class who said that if it were one of my close friends, she was sure win to be Miss IAC... DUH!! Could he just not see that everybody should have their chance to shine not only her and her over and over again!! Darn him asshole!!
And fortunately I won the match in Badminton , the sport I ike playing but I truly suck!!
After the sports whatever things... me and some of my classmates went out to celebrate one's birthday in Eastwood... nothing interesting happened except I gained a job level in Ragnarok!! wohooo.. nyaha
And I think that is about everything that added up to the complications of my disgusting dull dumb ass whoric life... wuhu
nothing interesting is hapening to my life... if you would want to ask...
Guess what, tomorrow is Dec 1, which means only a few days later before my birthday... which means ... new i-Pod mini!! wohooooo
Tomorrow is the dreaded day, staying with tooooot , which I think would be really uncomfortable because I was like , I'll leave you bye... thing like that... And I'll be walking around a lot of people.. modeling... ewwwww, not totally my style... And I've got to sing!!!! Why me? I still don't have any cd... waaaah... cry cry...
I just hope that tomorrow would really be a lucky day for all of us... I might even get the chance to stay with some of my friends after school.. but do you know something... this is only a might... waaaah
How could life be more cruel? I mean I thought that everything is gonna go well with my lovelife or whatever then my past which I thought I settled things up blurts out his madness!!!
And yet I'm this kind of girl who won't take a step if someone does not agree.. and since my past have feelings for me.. while the future doesn't care...
I think my past needs me more than the future.. besides my future has his own future...
So thats that... too bad...
Then I decided to sent a closing message for my past.. and it went like this, as I typed this damn thing, tears just kept on flowing... ass... :
[i]hi!! hello.. parang di kita nakikita eh.. deh
Sorry kung masyadong maraming nangkukulit sau tungkol sakin ha.. patawad po kasi di ko naman hiling un eh, sila naman po un.. de bale atleast nakakausap mo si aquino diba?? nyaha
Ito po ang masasabi ko sayo kung bakit po ako nag send ng message kasi di naman tayo nag uusap eh... maski alam kong pampagulo lang ako sa buhay mo o sa araw mo, at maski alam mo ring di kita tinitigilan na maski noon sinabi ko yaw ko na eh nakatago lang kasi un ung part na nalaman ko na may gusto ka pala sa isa sa pinaka close sakin.... wag kang mag alala kasi titigilan na rin kita...
maski alam kong wala kang pake, gusto ko lang nyo pong malaman na wala nang taga sira ng araw mo at wala na ring haharang sayo papunta kay aquino....
baka talagang kay buboy nga ako kasi di mo naman ako kayang mapansin eh... lagi napipilitan... ayaw ko ng ganun... maski madalas akong masaktan kay buboy, ganun siguro ang buhay ko...
kaya ... magsaya ka na ha... di bale, susubukan kong wag tumingin sayo, kausapin, at magpalapit ng kaibigan ko para mag tanong o kahit anu man...
gudluck nalang kay Aquino ha... mananahimik nalang ako para walang distorbo...[/i]
Oh goody, guess what... my life has been a total hell this past few days.... My relationship with someone... destroyed... its because that I'm just a very good person (ohh come on!!) Next is that I'm having a hard time controlling myself in doing my assignments or projects.. darn it...
But do you know... it seems that everyone wants my old me... as if, everyone wants to meet the real me just hiding behind this mask... but how could I return? There is no one to help me... I'm just alone...
My parents, friends... everyone wants me to be my own self for real... what is happening to my world!!! Darn them all!!!
But do you know, that even I, myself, wants my old me... Since I changed my school.. I haven't been myself lately.. the sweet, loving, no bad words coming out of her mouth, not that war freak, kinda mayabang, nature loving girl....
They didn't even know that because of what is happening around me is that this is the result... waaah.. too much drama..
oh well, this needs for total training.... old me... MUST be back!! For Real!
this is does not have to do with me because for sure I am soo unwanted in this world.. it just have to deal with some of my classmates... 2 guys cried just because they saw a name of a guy in a girl ,they adore a lot, at the back of her notebook... and then they gave up their "emotion" ... puuuweeeee... all I can say is that you are all LOSERS!!!
First of all, they didn't even know that the girl like likes this guy... don't come to conclusions... duh!!! How come I say this? Come on, this gal is totally experienced.
All I wanted to say is... look at me... even though that I KNOW!!! not think that the guy I kinda partly like totally likes one of my close friends, I still didn't give up.. like duh!!!! I know that it hurts but then you'll get over it... And even though that person keeps on going away from you, staying as far as possible , and of course I think hating you.... (actually this is how the guy I like treats me.. oh well this is life..) Just live with it... nyaha
This is over... it's over!!! nyaha... smilie me!!!
nyaha... I'm in school again... I'm done doing my thingy or our activity and so my teacher gave me a permission to go to any site... of course not porn or friendster... i am such a good girl.... noottt!! Nyaha!
nothing interesting is still happening to me... maybe I'll just be blurting out that I'm sooo bored... oh and did you know that my life sucks??? I think I told that to you about a hundred times.. hehehe
And right now... I'm sitting beside a very , large guy who just took my assignment and copied it... no its not cheating... hehehehhehe...
Oh and did you know that our first subject which is supposed to be english turned out to be our reading class who is headed by the least teacher I expected to stay or talk to... waaaah.. I'm afraid!!! Kidding only!
Because when my teacher knew this blog, they might blurt out my feelings!! waaah
why? Well I played badminton even though I didn't even know how to... I ended up being embarrased in front of everybody!! I am such a loser... I just wish that they didn't choose me instead!! But you know what, even though I lose I still felt as if I then knew that there are a lot out there who is always by my side... even some teachers.. hahahaa
Oh and I take back everything mean that I said to that mmmmmm. I'm ber ber sorry... i turns out that I can't say his name because there are a lot of classmates who are maybe opening my blog... gosh that must have sucked!!
Again.. thank you for everyone who kept my spirit up... I owe one to all of you out there!!! wahoooooo... especially to mmmmmm.. nyaha... even though I know that he doesn't like me, he still took time to atleast look at me... I think... maybe... and he even allowed my classmates to joke him around.... I also owe you one!! nyaha
So I think thats all I can say towards you.... and all of you peepz out there!! byerz!!
I'm very thank for all the people who is visiting my blog.. just remember one thing... I love you all!!! nyahahaha
Ok this is a moment for me to [b]SHOUT OUT![/b] to those bitches who must not ruin my life!!
Maybe I won't say the name but I'll say the hint..
Firstly to that fucking person who thinks my blog sucks!!! how did I know?? it turns out on our computer time... she chanted something and luckily somebody heard and told all about it.. she even tried to act innocent... [b]DAMN[/b] YOU!!! Gosh, who the hell she is to partly shout out her compliment about this... I don't care!!! And if she thinks my blog sucks... surely... why does she she even mind going to my blog and check it out??? Most probably ingit!!! nyaha... Mark my words little missy... [b]I DON'T HELL CARE ABOUT YOU!![/b]
Next is to that bastard who thinks I'm totally head over heals over him... AS IF!!! If only he knew what was I thinking then possibly he would be soo ashamed... asshole!! In case you know that I didn't see you make a move and put a disgust face in your face just because someone was pointing at you... [b]YOU SUCK BIG TIME BITCH!!![/b] For sure , why the hell would I talk with someone else about you?? huh??? darn you!!!
Lastly... I think thats all I can say...
Oh do you know that our class won the volleyball match??? Yipee!!!! Nyaha And do you know that tomorrow is my big day... being one of the chosen ones in badminton in our class...
All I wanted to say to all of my classmate... [b]ADVANCE SORRY 1-14[/b]... booohoooo... Anyway thats why theres this quote...
"Manalo, Matalo... cute parin kami!!" nyahahaha :lol:
